Don’t Worry, Be Happy | Ten Key Points to Optimism | TicTalkToe

Two realizations that struck me all of a sudden! 

We wear masks, mostly out of the fear of being judged by others!

We work for jobs we really don’t care for, and end up staying in relationships that are not genuine. 

Please read them again and again. Am sure most of you will be able to relate to it.

After my last blog post on Minding One’s Own Business, which climbed up the charts very steadily, I received many messages of appreciation. Messages explaining the trauma that one had to go through due to these nosy friends. Few of you also unfollowed and unfriended me, taking the cue, which was also a positive step in my life. As if “the trash took itself out!” I am a very happy go lucky kind of a person, and yes, negativity bothers me! Hence, I try to remain as neutral and as diplomatic as possible, even in my daily life.

After this episode, I was going through creative content crisis, when a friend Dipra Banerjee suggested me to Blog about Happiness and Optimism. I was not too sure if I could do justice, but hey, let me give it a try. And as always, if my Blog Post even changes the mindset of a single person, I will be more than happy to know that.

Honestly speaking, as I begin writing this post, let me confess that there is no straight jacket formula to happiness and optimism. While someone may find happiness in the simplest of things, others may not be content even if they have a lot on their plate. So I’ll try and address this situation in the simplest manner.

Have you ever realised that you are always in control of your own day. Many don’t realise that actually! Your happiness is always guided by what goes on around you, including the circle you frequently interact with. Wake up to a positive thought. No amount of money, problems, set of circumstances will determine whether you have a good or a bad day! You do. 

What does happiness mean to you?

Before you try and define happiness, just close your eyes, breathe and think, what makes you happy? A familiar old song? Sitting by the window when it is raining outside? That last size of pizza that you save for your loved one? Running a marathon? Self indulgence is as much happiness as sacrifice is! If you dream it, go for it!

However, the real question here is, how can someone be happy and optimistic, despite all the negativity around us? Let me cite a few instances that have helped me in my daily life.

• BE KIND AND COURTEOUS: Be kind, to yourself, to the ones you come across. Be courteous. A simple thank you costs nothing, but will leave a smile on the other person’s face. I have seen how Big Basket Delivery Boys rush to deliver the order, but when I leave a simple thank you before closing the door, they turn back, smile and respond. We are all human beings. We all need to be kind, and to treat each other with kindness. 

• LOVE YOU ZINDAGI: Every single day, I write one thing I am thankful about. Just ONE. It could be as simple as, I did my laundry on time. Or may be, I have the luxury to Work From Home. Or it can also be, the chilly chicken I cooked today tasted exactly restaurant style. Something as basic as that! Just follow this for 15 days and see how you evolve as a person! Read them over and over again when you feel sad. Happiness is just around the corner! 

• PLAN WELL IN ADVANCE: I know it might sound extremely stupid, because life is anyway that is happening when you are least expecting it. Still, I love planning my day, my week, my events well in advance so that I don’t have to go into last minute panic rush! Having said that, everyone asks you to plan, but no one explains how to deal with the unplanned surprises. In such cases, change what you can, but learn to make peace with what you cannot change. 

• TAKE CALCULATED RISKS: Risks are adventurous, but remember to know your limits. Calculate your risks, as the old proverb goes “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket”. Move on, take that risk, but ensure that you have a back-up plan. That way, even if you fail, you know that not everything is gone.

• NOT ALL DAYS ARE THE SAME: Accept this. And move on! Today your food might taste restaurant style, but tomorrow the same could be a disaster with too much of salt in it. Accept it. Move on! Tomorrow will be better.

• FIND A PURPOSE IN LIFE: Everybody is sent on Earth with a purpose. The only challenge is to discover it and nurture it. It could be as basic as, waking up tomorrow because you need to take care of your plants. Every human being should have some purpose in life, no matter whether you are employed, or are a home-maker! Sit down and note 10 different activities that you perform on a loop everyday, which goes un-noticed. You will soon find your purpose. Grow, learn, fail. But keep trying!

• STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS: I have always loved my father because he has never compared me with any other human being, and the one time that he accidentally did, he regretted over it. Many of my batch-mates are high ranking judicial officers, and I am extremely proud of them. Again, many of my batch-mates are home-makers, looking after their little ones, and I am equally proud of them. None of them have made me feel superior to, or inferior to them in any way! I am happy in my own little world, and I wish them happiness without being judgmental. Simply put, as your fingers are not of the same length, same goes for human beings and their characteristics. You never know the situation, circumstances in which the other person is rowing his boat. Hence, please stop comparing.   

• DON’T LET SOCIAL MEDIA FOOL YOU: Admit it, Social Media shows you only the rosy side of things. Nobody wants to display pain, grief and suffering on social media. I know couples who are happy but rarely post pictures on social media. I know people with over thousands of followers, but are lonely. Not everything that you see is real. Don’t try and live someone else’s life. Be unique, be original. 

• LEARN TO LET GO: The sooner you learn this, the better! In our life, we shall come across thousands of people. Some choose to stay, others move on. Let the ones moving on go. Don’t cling to them. Nothing is permanent, not even feelings. The ones who really value you will stay, no matter what.   

• Last and the most important one, surround yourself with POSITIVE PEOPLE. There goes a common saying “Your vibe attracts your tribe!” Please believe in that. If you surround yourself with too much of negativity and clutter, it is bound to reflect on your mental state and you start cribbing all the time. Wake up to a good breakfast, and start on a positive note. Yes, you might miss your bus, your coffee might spill on your new shirt, but relax! This cannot be undone. However, you can take the next bus and send the shirt for dry cleaning. Isn’t it?

And as always, when you are going through a rough phase, always remember, this too shall pass.

With that, I rest my Blog Post on happiness and optimism here. Do let me know your thoughts on it.

This Blog Post was a part of the #LetsBlogWithPri S2

If this post on happiness was useful to you, you can also indulge in Mandala drawing that will make you happy. Check out Urvashi’s BlogPost about Mandala drawing for Kids and adults

Sindhu has a Book Review on UNEARTHED – An environmental history of Independent India

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